Orphan Sunday

Orphan Sunday is November 3rd this year. If you haven't gone to the website yet, I would definitely check it out--including the videos and other resources they have. And if you're a leader in a church--or even attend church, you should speak with someone about showing a video/having someone speak about orphans/printing out the bulletin inserts/etc. Some of us attend church each week with people constantly checking with us on how our adoption/fostering stuff is going, and we have a deep desire to include people in our passion for our little ones (whether we know who they are yet or not). This is a great way, not only to be able to show off our love for the kids placed in our families, but to get people excited about helping orphans all over the world. This isn't a day to celebrate adoption or fostering specifically, but to point to orphan awareness and the need to help, and provide ways to protect these sweet little lives. Plus an entire day devoted to attention and prayer for orphans by hundreds of churches all over the world is a pretty powerful weapon! 

And here's where I have to stop and get off track a little to add that the the deeper I get into adoption, the bigger I see the horrible problems of this world that bring these kids to the place where they are without their parents to protect and care for them. I obviously love adoption and think it is beautiful, but with that beauty comes pain. I love being able to raise awareness for orphans, but these children would rather not be orphans in the first place. It breaks my heart that many, many of these little ones are orphans for reasons that would have been preventable if we would have stepped up before orphan care was needed for each individual child. There are parents who want to be able to feed their child but know they can't, or the parent is physically sick with AIDS or other health issues and they die because they don't have medicine to keep them healthy as long as possible, or the child was born with a special need and their culture deemed them unworthy and/or their parents knew they could not afford to pay for their care no matter how minor or correctable their disability might be. And there are hundreds of other reasons these little ones are in orphanages or on the streets, and it hurts to know that so many of those reasons are because of things that we could help with just by providing money, time, and prayer to some wonderful organizations that would prevent families from being torn apart and childrens' little lives being broken.
I don't believe that the little one that will someday be a part of our family was put in another woman's womb, torn from their first family in whatever painful way, placed in an orphanage all so neatly just so they could be adopted by us. Adoption is not about me, families were originally meant to be kept together. None of us, including innocent little children, were meant to have so much pain in our lives. This world is full of ugly things, including poverty and addiction and abandonment, and those ugly things unfortunately transform happy, content little ones who should be living with their first parents into needy, heartbroken children. These little ones in some way need to have us reach out and help whether it be through prayer, financial assistance, a voice, encouragement, support for someone adopting or fostering, or giving them a home. Help starts before families are torn apart and follows through to orphan care. And it's because ugly things turn children into orphans that makes orphan care so extraordinary. It's people stepping up and saying they will help in ways that go beyond themselves to children who may or may not ever even know about each individual person that helped them. So without listing the hundreds of different ways to help families and orphans I would encourage you to pray about how you can use Orphan Sunday--and every day for that matter--to bring attention to these sweet children, both for yourself and as a community.
(It's actually really hard for me to stop there because I do want to start linking to different organizations that provide a way to keep families together or work to support orphans in special ways. I think I'm going to have to start a weekly spotlight....)

Since we meet as a church on Saturday nights we will be celebrating Orphan Saturday, November 2nd at Providence Community Church. Kyle will be talking about his book and we'll show an Orphan Sunday video and he'll also be talking about our adoption. So if you're in the Dallas area and you want to come learn more about Indian and/or adoption you should visit!

One step down 93 more to go

We are blessed with some amazing people in our lives. Thank you to mom for helping clean and the Vaughn's for taking the kids for a little bit! We also had tons of friends asking how the home study went and/or letting us know they've been praying for it. I could definitely tell we were being prayed for since I only got nervous for a couple minutes right before Susan got here to talk with us. It went so well, and way easier than we thought it was going to be. I couldn't imagine it being too difficult since we had already written our autobiography and had a few friends send in reference letters for us--I mean how much more information was she going to need about us?! But we were ready to spill our guts and have her put on some white gloves to check for dust--I even made a point to turn on my living room fan since I didn't want to clean it and it was covered with dust. So, I ended up being a little disappointed that the only rooms she went in were the kids' since they pretty much dragged (drug?) her in to show how clean they were, and the bathroom--you know, to use it for it's intended purpose. I didn't even hear the medicine cabinet quietly open (because who doesn't do that just for fun/nosy reasons when they visit people?).
Susan interviewed the kids for about 10 minutes each, and they did a fantastic job being themselves: Eli super smart and Charlotte super silly. Love them. I was glad to hear they know they're getting a little sister who won't look like them because she'll be brown with brown hair--or purple or pink...because really, does it matter that much? And then Kyle's parents came to take the kids off for a few hours while she talked with us. This was a huge answer to prayer since I had no idea how we were going to get a word in with the kids here talking her ears off--and I didn't want her to see me beating them or locking them in closets. (Can I joke about that on an adoption blog?) She pretty much just asked a few fill in the blank questions from our autobiographies and talked with Kyle forever about his book, and his views on teaching, and Nicholas Kristoff, and why the millennial generation is lazy, and being a forever learner, etc, etc. Hey, we're a pretty cool family but she quickly picked up on who the interesting one is. That was about it. We learned a lot about her, and she learned a little more about us, and she ate a couple of my fresh, homemade cookies I had made to get a few bonus points, and then she was off. And I was exhausted, but really happy with that behind us--and to have a super clean house to rest my lazy millennial generation self in.
Now all we have to do is WAIT. She'll be writing up the report in the next few weeks--she said honestly it probably won't be until the end of October that she gets to ours, and then it has to be read over by us and then the adoption agency and then back to her to get copied, notarized, etc, and then back to us. So in the meantime I'll be working on updating our passports that have expired and finishing up the final application for Children of the World (our adoption agency). I'm hoping we'll be registered in India by the end of this year. I know it's not smart to put time lines on adoption in any way, but I'm praying that that is so far out that there's no way it can't happen. Actually, I'm praying she is able to write our home study sooner than that and everything moves along quickly, but I'm trusting the Lord to provide me with the patience I need for the time it takes. Susan in fact kept saying over and over how she has a few families adopting from India that have been waiting 12-18 months just for a referral and not to expect things to move quickly. I have no idea what the circumstances are with these families and if they're going for completely healthy kids or not, but we will be waiting for a special needs little one, so I'm not sure what kind of time difference that will make.
Speaking of details on who we're waiting for--Susan said she'd approve us for up to two kids, and because of our young kids and ideas about attachment issues she would like to say 4 and under if they're siblings, or no older than 3 for a single child. This is a little younger than we were first open to since I want to be open to any little one the Lord brings to us and I know the older they are the harder it is to find families for them, but I'm also okay with it at this time in our lives. And I'm also okay with it since I know home studies can be amended if needed. ;)
I don't know who this will bring us, or how long it will take, I'm just thankful this step is behind us and the empty space on our adoption board that was filled with home study paperwork will soon be filled with dossier paperwork ready to be sent to India. Baby steps, but steps nonetheless!

The shirts are in!

FINALLY!! Our shirts have arrived and I'm so excited to pass them out so people can think about and pray for our little one each time they wear or see one. We do have a few extra, but they're already starting to be claimed, so let us know ASAP if you want one. If we have enough requests we'll start accepting more pre-orders for another batch, but we'll wait on that for now since I've had enough troubles on shirts for the next month or two. :)
And I'm really busy getting ready for our home study this weekend--you know, by talking to a friend on the phone for two hours and reading a book. I like the pressure of waiting until the last minute--and having my mom here to clean for me. Thanks mom! Kidding--hopefully I'll have lots done before you get here on Thursday.

Scattered

Hellllooooo! I don't really have anything to say since nothing is really happening, but I thought I'd post to say there's nothing really happening. We were hoping to have the home study visit done by now and then our social worker would have it written up and sent to our adoption agency by the end of this month, but unfortunately due to things within and without of our control we couldn't schedule the visit until the 28th of this month. But it is happening. It's on our calendar, and we're still finishing up the last few things (medical exams/TB tests) and then we'll just be waiting around for the last Saturday to arrive. Time has been moving pretty quickly with the kids going back to school and all the other daily activities, so I haven't even had time to wish our visit day to come quickly. Plus, my house is a DISASTER, so I have more time to get that all beautified--or to sit around thinking of all that it will take to get it beautified. Any volunteers to come find a way to keep my kids' rooms and living room/playroom organized? Maybe a drill sergeant to whip them (and me) into shape would be better.
And since I'm making updates on the usual adoption waiting stuff, our t-shirts did come in the other day but were definitely messed up enough that we had to call and request them to reprint the order correctly. We have to drive out to Keller next Monday to get it all sorted out and hopefully have the shirts printed and sent back to us within the next couple weeks. Sorry if you've ordered one--I promise we didn't just steal your money and run off to Hawaii...although I think I just heard Kyle say, "wait, can we do that?" Kidding--we know our little one is twenty times more beautiful than Hawaii...and relaxing...?

Now some fun, good news--a friend from college (hi Julie!) left me a comment on my last post saying she found my blog through my pin on Pinterest about Kyle's book, and wanted me to pray for her and her husband about maybe becoming foster parents. I was sooo excited to hear this because even though I haven't talked to either one of them in years, they are still a couple of the funniest, nicest, most wonderful people I've ever met. They would be amazing foster parents and I'm so thankful they're praying about this! Then, my best friend from college (hi Michelle!) called the next day and told me to come meet with her so she could tell me about their plans on fostering/fostering to adopt. This coming from the girl who said she never wanted kids (she was lying, I knew she'd have lots), and now has three boys and no real plans of being an official empty nester. She and Jason are amazing parents (and people!) so another one or ten kids in their home will be a definite blessing. AND THEN, without either one of these couples talking to each other, they walked into their first fostering class and ran into each other. BEAUTIFUL! I'm planning on making them both attend a foster/adoption conference with me in October and any other meetings/activities Tapestry has that we can go to together. I know there's a couple other people who may be interested in the conference, even if you're not going through the adoption process right now, so check it out and plan to go with Kyle and me--it's free!!

(Ha--this is me not having anything to say)

Bragging moment

I very quickly mentioned in my last post that my husband is the creative one. He writes, he takes photos, he can make a beautiful video, etc, etc--Kyle is pretty much amazing.
Last summer he went to India with American Councils for International Education (I just had to copy and paste that name since I usually just say he went to teach), but he did soooo very much more than that on his trip. He met another creative teacher, Breanna, who introduced him to a nonprofit agency in Kolkata called New Light. Since I would never be able to include all that this amazing place does off the top of my head I'll again just copy and paste what they have to say.

"New Light is a non-profit community development project and charitable trust based in Kalighat, Kolkata, one of the oldest red light districts of the city.
Since 2000, New Light has provided shelter, educational opportunities, recreational facilities, healthcare and legal aid for the children, girls and women in the Kalighat community. There is a crèche and night-shelter for the protection and education of victims of trafficking, women in prostitution, and children rescued from red light areas. New Light also provides micro-credit facilities and an income-generation program (Anchal) for mothers within the area. With regard to healthcare, New Light is particularly concerned with HIV/ AIDS prevention, care and treatment. New Light is a secular organization, and women from all religious communities are invited to join the organization. The demographic composition reflects India's diversity, with Hindi-speaking and non-Indian women from Nepal and Bangladesh representing 30% of the community."

In other words--just like my husband--New Light and the founder, Urmi Basu, is pretty much amazing. 

Kyle and Breanna saw an opportunity to be creative, but also to get a word out where a word was needed, and applied for a grant to create a book that would tell the stories of these children at New Light. They took beautiful pictures and were given stories of the kids, and with the kids own creativity through words and drawings they designed a beautiful book called A New Light in Kalighat that they were able to do a small printing of, and then made it into an e-book--which you should definitely check out! 

And THEN Kyle e-mailed people at Half the Sky, a movement that first began as a book by Nicholas Kristoff and Sheryl WuDunn and later was made into a film. Half the Sky raises awareness and encourages action to fight the oppression of women worldwide. I would highly encourage everyone to read the book or watch the film. It's an eye opening look into different places in the world where women are oppressed and deserve the chance to be seen and have someone stand up for them. New Light happened to be one of the places they visited, and they were very eager to share about this book on their blog. Which meant being on their facebook page, and seen by thousands of people. I'm prouder than proud to be his wife. For his stepping up and doing something for these kids, for not stopping when the nights got long with editing, for pushing for it to be put out to the world through an e-book, and for being acknowledged for being an awesome man who was willing to do all that.

Kyle could tell you more about this trip and his feelings about it and maybe I'll make him post some time soon, but until then I get to speak for him. He fell instantly in love with the kids. Yes, he respected Urmi and everything she stood for, he thought New Light was a great place that did inspiring things for children and women, but mainly, he was in awe of the kids and the hope and beauty that he saw in their faces. I know--mainly because he tells me a few times a week--and also just because I know how pretty much amazing he is, that he would go back in an instant. He would sit with those kids and play with them and teach them for hours, but because he knew that that wasn't possible at the time or in the very near future, he and Breanna accepted a challenge of doing what they could while they were there. 

I hijacked Kyle's fb earlier so I could get a glimpse of him in the limelight, and was reading the comments that people were saying about this book on Half the Sky's page, and someone said "SEE we can make a difference....thank you." And he's right--we can. Kyle went to India thinking he was going to get to spend five weeks teaching kids in a school and explore as much of his favorite country as his extra time would allow, and he came home with a grant and photos and words and ideas that would affect the lives of so many. He had no idea--he just lived in the moment and seized an opportunity to make a great impact for others. Someone else said, "These people are living my dream..." And I'm thankful that Kyle was able to live this dream--his dream. I can't wait to see where this will lead. Pretty much amazing, right?

Our lives in paper form

Last week was a good week for us in completing a couple of our big home study requirements--we finished our 10 hour online Hague adoption training and had our fingerprints done (unfortunately I'm not one of those fun picture taker adoptive parents, so no pictures of that!). Now the only things we have left to do is finish getting copies of different paperwork--pretty easy; and filling out questions with Kyle and writing our autobiographies--a little more difficult for me! I just need to sit down and start writing and I'm sure it won't be a big deal, it's the thought of doing it that is wearing me down.
The paperwork isn't as hard to do as I thought it might be, it's just the fact that the list seems to get longer instead of shorter each week with different people sending more stuff we have to sign, or dig up in our files, or order certified copies of, or take to Staples to make copies of, or get notarized, etc. I thought it would be easier to do while Kyle was home during the summer but with the busyness of the last couple months it wasn't nearly as organized and full of free time as I was hoping. The kids don't start school until the beginning of September and I don't really want to wait until then to get it all done, but taking two rambunctious kids to the clerk's office or staples everyday does not get me excited. But it will all get done--and soon! There are a couple things we have to wait until the beginning of September to do because of Kyle's new job, but we're hoping to have it all together by the first week of September, have our home study done that week or the next, and then our awesome social worker will hopefully have it all written up by the end of September. That's a far cry from originally wanting it to be done by mid-July, but I'm learning to slow down and not stress about little baby step days, weeks, months going by without any seeming progress happening, and then all of a sudden I look at it all adding up to a big step and it moves us closer to our little one. Me saying all this probably makes it seem overwhelming and not at all enjoyable, but it's actually a little fun to see our whole lives all laid out like this.
Most photos you see on this blog are from my creative husband who is great at documenting our life in a beautiful way. However, you may get lucky and see a horrible quality iPad picture taken by me...which is what you're getting today. :)

Our adoption corner. Hopefully once we are matched with our child it'll be a little more exciting with the board filled with less paperwork and a picture or two!

 Close up of our paperwork corkboard---it's me trying to pretend I'm organized. Notice I had to add even more paperwork between the pictures? Too bad you're not lucky enough to see a better picture of my awesome art work--closest to chalkboard art you'll ever see from me! But I am planning on making the board a little prettier with paint and fabric.

Sportin' some India love

***We have put our order in with the pre-orders we received, plus a few extra in case someone decided to buy one down the road. We ordered about 3 extra in each size in adults, and 1 extra in each kid size. Let me know if you're interested in ordering and I'll let you know if we have any left!***

Our shirts are available to pre-order right now and they are really cute. Our very talented friend Kelsey designed them and she did an amazing job (both designing them and putting up with me!). Thanks Kelsey!!
If you want to look cute and support our adoption all at the same time you should order one. Here's the info--copy and pasted from Kyle's fb--make him do all the work. ;)

To help support our adoption, you can order a t-shirt for a donation of $20. You can see the design below, created by Kelsey McCormick Turner (thanks, Kelsey). The colors may change slightly based on shirt availability. We will likely go with either a lighter grey or a darker grey than the shirt below, and the logo color might change slightly depending on the shirt color.

If you'd like to order a shirt, e-mail me natalie (dot) vaughn @ gmail (dot) com.

Please make sure to let us know (especially if you're mailing your donation):
1. how many shirts you are ordering
2. size / sizes
3. contact info

P.S.--if you are interested at all in kid sizes let me know. I thought it would be nice to have them available, but want to see how much interest there is before we commit to printing some. I think they would be around $15, but not positive.